Saturday, October 18, 2014

Moving Down The Alphabet

I wonder...

Did I actually love my "first love"?

I loved around him
I loved of him
gave myself to him

I wanted him to love me
and he did

in a way

I believe

But I do not think I loved him like this
And maybe that is 20 years of living
20 years of growing up
and growth
or maybe it is what this love and I have built

the time
the trust
being there even though

my trusting him

and he constantly pushing me
and pushing limits
pushing buttons
but holding me
when I needed him to

maybe this is the first time I've been in love ever
or maybe just this kind of love
this real
of a love

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